Over the course of a lifetime, we tend to gather many things we perceive of as having value. It might be an art collection. Maybe you’re one of those who stocked up on Beanie Babies when they were a hot item. Perhaps you’ve been investing in blue chip stocks, or index funds, or real estate. We all have something we hold dear.
Yet are the things we value, the tangible assets of life, really all that important in the long run? Could there be something we’re missing that has greater value?
In truth there is only one thing we all have control over in our lives. It doesn’t reflect on our net worth, but it does count heavily toward how worthwhile we are as an individual.
Any one of us can lose everything we have. It can all be taken from us. For all our planning and careful execution, we aren’t fully in control of our health, or wealth, or even our life itself. Bad luck, recessive genes, economic collapse, or even a global pandemic have the power to take it all from us overnight. And there’s not much we can do about any of it.
What we can control, we too often choose not to. We’re too ethically flexible for that.
I’m talking about integrity. Your commitment to be honest. To carry yourself through life with the promise that your word is your bond. To accept and admit your faults, even when that admission can hurt you.
Nothing in life trumps integrity.
Once it’s lost or wasted it can never be fully restored to its original luster. Cheat on your spouse and you’ll carry that black mark on your record forever. Welch on a debt and you’ll have a hard time finding a loan in the future. If you do it will likely come at a significantly higher rate than it would have if you’d been honest.
Risk comes at a cost, and nothing suggests we are a risk to others like the knowledge that we have run afoul of others in the past, through no fault of their own. If we lack integrity the word tends to get around. And that ain’t good.
Let’s face it, being honest and true can be hard. We’re all flawed. We all fail from time to time. Those of us who strive to accomplish big things share that in common. We’re not all so committed to our reputation and our standing in the community we live or work in that we’re not willing to fudge a bit here and there. Especially if it helps us get ahead. At least for the moment. We can fix the reputational damage later. Can’t we?
Look, it doesn’t matter if you’re a janitor or a CEO, a bus driver or an airline pilot. Whatever your station in life, your integrity is the only thing of value you really have, the only thing you will ever have, that is completely within your control. Which leaves each one of us with a nagging internal question that we might be inclined to ignore to our own detriment.
That question is this; am I a good person?
Only you can truly know the answer to that question. And yes, you can lie. You could lie to your spouse, your employer, your friends, even your children. But can you carry off that lie for decades? Can you live a full and complete life without at least occasionally letting the cat out of the bag? At least to yourself during those quiet hours late at night when some unidentifiable issue or other is keeping you from falling asleep. Your unquiet mind is vexed by a worry of some sort. Perhaps one that you can’t even articulate, but you know it’s there and it won’t leave you alone. Maybe not for the night. Maybe not for years on end.
Fortunately, human beings can be forgiving. If you’ve let your integrity, get away from you, there is always time to redeem yourself. Perhaps not completely. But enough to win back wronged friends. You might restore a bruised business relationship or two. You might even patch up the leaky boat that your marriage has become due to your prior willingness to play fast and loose with the truth.
No, you will probably never be able to bring yourself back to the childhood innocence you once possessed but threw away. You can try, however. And that effort alone has real value – provided the attempt is sincere.
This year, you might consider giving yourself the gift of integrity for the holidays. For those of us who have kept theirs intact, there may be no more precious attribute we could commit ourselves to preserving. For those who may have let their store of integrity lose some value over the years, there’s no time like the present for taking on the most relevant construction project you’ll ever face.
I wish us all good luck, good friends, and prosperity. All of which are enhanced when sprinkled with the magical fairy dust of our own rock-solid integrity.